Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Despicable OLD me

Assalamualaikum i wish to all readers.

Today, Now, as i mentioned above, i am going to reveal my dark side.
This dark sides, was happened a very long time ago. Dark side, or some of you might interpret this word to 'Aib'.
Well, since majority do not know the real Kak Jah is, my intention is to reveal these dark sides for you to not copy the old 'ME', the behaviour or thoughts (the way im thinking). i mean, do same things i was before. and for those who know me, please do not mention about my past, its ... past already k. I am not living there any more  take this as a lesson, for you to not have regret. and be grateful .... .... just ignore this. =..=

my recommendation, if you had ever ask yourself  'How to be a success person?' or 'How to be better?', and you wanted to gain some knowledge from somebody,
ask The person who has failed the test and get up.

not to mention anybody but, do not ask somebody who has never taste any failure or foolishness.
because what can they say is simple thing. they think that everything is very simple to them. ting ting.

ok dah. straight to the title, My OLD mistakes are...

1. Fall in love to a guy + Make a guy fall in love with me.

a) dont be such stupid go eat eat their words... awww haha. for example of me! ok.. i fall in love with a guy, and so as he. he said "i like you because you are sooooo pious!".. and i was like ... amazed by that words. bangga2.. inflate. and i said yes to him :O then we plan to get married someday blablabla.. you see how pious + stupid i am? hahahahahah during my stupidity is happening, i keep asking him "do you think what are we doing this is RIGHT??" because i cant think! you know what, along the relationship is going on, i do feel the flower tahi ayam tu but ive never felt comfortable, i keep asking him questions and bother him a lot because he said its ok. so wat? ask je la banyak2 haha pfftt... after i realized my foolishness (takes about a month) finally we broke up. and i say 'you are stupid too' haha i can see that teenage girls nowadays easily jump to guy's boat :/ 

I think.. as long as we think this is ISLAMIC couple, so i thought we were safe. that is why it last about a month.sometimes, i do not feel comfortable because there is something wrong with this relationship. and a word shooting my mind, "Would Allah bless this?". yeah, i dont think so. because we can feel the sparkle of love even though we never met. yeah, i never met him, i just bump on him on Facebook -_-" cinta muka buku. puihh..

one interesting blog to share regarding about this situation :

After we broke up or .. can i say broken down? broken english nihh -.- ishh.. (continue) i put 100% faith and trust on Allah, if this guy is meant to be with me, then ill wait for what will happening next. i dont know oh Allah. You know everything, and i keep praying to get the best husband from You. (or better than that guy) no best husband in the world except Rasulullah SAW. :D

b) yes, i am accidentally make boys fall in love with me. i make them impress with what ive got. not by using my body or appearance. but, intelligence, words, and.. piousness?? you will see how low your intelligence is when you accept a boy with beautiful words je? . puih. a good guy, when you ask them, they want a girl wearing hijab properly, covered aurah, not following the trend whatsoever... and that time, i was feel like i am that girl! hey! *waving~ "You belong with me~ ohh~" haha rase baik gile kott aku nihh... like i deserve to be isteri mithali! puih! i hate my past! haha hey hey hey, Alhamdulillah i am invisible. you dont know how bad the real me before.. no one wants to expose their bad side :/ (not recommended to say)

c) another thing is wrong about loving people is, girls always dreaming of this ! :

we want something beautiful~~~~~~ blablabla we want couple because we expecting something wonderful behind it. doesnt it? how are you going to feel the wonderful of love without HIS bless? derr~
However girls, if this things had in to you, never regret. your timeline were like this because it was meant to be, and in positive side, there is some reasons behind this. you get stronger to not fall in love so easy or careful in simple word, and be patient for the RIGHT TIME Allah wants to give you the best man you ever dream. there will be in the right time. insyaAllah. dont blame the guy. he is just a character in that part of our lifetime. not more than that. so, hit this. haha :p

2. When doing the exam...

a) yes, i have that spirit! i study hard! smart! confidence. etc. im sure going to score this time! surely PAY OFF for my effort! but.. i failed :/ i was crying wondering wondering and wondering why... i dah usaha, dah doa dah! oh i missed one important thing, its TAWAKKAL. dont forget that bebeh.

b) and yes you got that spirit, and you want to do this hardly!! and you dont realize that you do the exam so hard! you make things hard! actually, you have to take it easy, relax.... tenang. then u can think.

c) DOA. ask for - relaxing mind and heart, good ideas, wide and wise thinking...

3. Set up Facebook account. (including MySpace

Ok. i think no one like this, Kak Jah ni tak abes2 masalah ngan pesbuk. ape lagi?!! haha what ever it is... facebook is disaster for me. i dont feel..... safe. facebook is like something you want to chase.. running for it... something yang buat kau gelabah kot. ntahlah. 

ada salah seorang ilmuwan islam a good scholars, very well known, but i dont remember his name, hehe. however, i remember his wise message, sounds like this "if i find that people raising me up, i will be mad at them!" siapa yang memuji muji aku, aku akan marah orang tersebut. hey, this is not the real message copy and paste, but this is what ive understand from the original message. sounds like he will scold the people who praising praising him like an enemy! well, i think this is good. because he doesnt want to be ripple (riak) -google translated-. 

and i dont want that too.(not recommending all muslimah to pose like this please) finally realized that, i m not comfortable and actually hate people seeing me... looking at me... or look directly how my face was?! haha. "MENATAP" gambar2 saya?  especially eyes from a guy? no way! not that easy cheapy girl. k. back to ripple, indeed, we cant figure out whether the person is rippling or not. BUT! i know i am rippling if i exposing myself! look at me! im wearing huge hijab, handsocks applied, love Allah, i always came out with wise words... i am good and i knew it. bodoh en. hahaha. no no no, this is too gigantic. 
nak tahu kita riak ke tak lebih lanjut: 

i mean, when you put something like photos in fesbuk without any intention of riak or whatever, your intention is just I WANT TO PUT THIS. and knew its visible by everybody. from that no any intention, its become habit you want to post expose yourself. then, setan datang post lagi post lagi, bagi orang tahu siapa kau... let you be famous! angkat dagu. remember, medan bercakap tak sama dengan medan beramal. what you DO is who you are, NOT what are TALK about yourself. 
that is why, i invisible myself, so that... when i wanted to give some advice to a people, or i post something anything or i do something rude or harsh to people in facebook coincidentally.. bad side or good side of me.. its not me! its KAK JAH! ahhahaha k. seriusly  big thing grew from tiny simple thing like...... LIKE (y) . 

when peoplessssss liking2 your status, you feel... great! kan? like, meaning that, people praise you! "you are right!" "you are very intelligent girl!" and all those good words that you makes u feel good~ you feel you want to do it more more more and more! dush! terrible! gelabah. itulah, jiwa remaja sekarang. exposing, expressing di tempat murahan / free,.. pesbuk. maapler tangan Kak Jah celupar.

eh, fesbuk kak jah, deleted. :D happy to say that, even the 'Tom' says "we hate to see you leave" =..= i commented, facebook doesnt give me any benefit. sorry. thank you for all memories. haha


I think these 4 thing is the worst about me to talk about. if i get any idea, i will update this. not update my fb status. wahahaha da tade. tenang weh tenang.. feel free macam nih

Happy Final Exam Sem 1 Nov 2012 semua orang. sekian.


"everybody got a dark side... do you love me? can you love mine! nobody pictures perfect~ (BUT, Practice makes perfect! till when are you going stay in that tiny imperfect box?)"

"You are not stupid, you are LEARNING"

FACEBOOK. its hard  to make it permanently deleted =='
cant stand when everyone is using it 
including my discussion group for education purpose of kos.

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